International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers, December 17th 2010
This Friday, December 17th, marks the seven year anniversary of the International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers.
In this post I want to share with you 7 simple ways that you can get involved and show your support for this very important cause.
But first I want to tell you a very personal story from my life that I have never shared before.
This is an event that affected me very deeply, and is one of the unspoken reasons why I created myHoneysuckle.
The date was Tuesday morning, January 14th, 2003.
I was living in Oakland, California working at the Eros Guide, and I had just moved to the early bird shift.
As soon as I arrived to work this morning, I was told the horrible news that one of our advertisers had been brutally murdered.
I was stunned, especially because I immediately recognized her name.
I had spoken on the phone with this woman, I had designed a custom banner for her, I had worked on her ad numerous times.
She was found stuffed into a recycling bin just a few miles down the road from where I was now standing.
Her life had been stripped from her, and her body treated with no more respect than household garbage.
I was shocked, filled with sadness, and also a deep feeling of rage.
Her name was Marisa Zaras and she advertised under the stage name Kristy Kash at the time of her death. She was known as Remy in a era before that, and that is what I knew her best as.
The surreal experience of that morning, as I personally helped take down her advertisements, as it sunk in that her life was taken from her, it was in this moment that I realized the incredibly real violence that entertainers face every day.
It was also unfortunately a very grim foreshadowing to many more violent acts upon entertainers that I would be exposed to in the next eight years.
Shortly afterwards, I learned about Gary Ridgway.
Gary Ridgway killed at least 48 women throughout the 1980s and 1990s, and almost all of them were sex workers.
The details of this horrific story are gruesome and heart-breaking.
This serial killer admitted to targeting sex workers specifically because, “I thought I could kill as many of them as I wanted without getting caught.”
Why would Gary Ridgway think that?
The sad truth is, he didn’t just think that, he knew that.
He knew that his victims lived in the fringe of society, silenced by shame.
He knew that his victims did not have a supportive network to follow up with about their whereabouts.
He knew that his victims would not warrant the focused attention of LE like most other citizens.
He knew all of this, and it gave him the confidence to target these women.
It is important to note that these women were not special in any other way. They were born into normal families in normal communities. Some were born into wealthy homes, while others were born into less wealthy situations.
These were ordinary human beings, just like you and me.
Any of these women could have been your best friend, your sister, your aunt, the girl behind the counter that makes your coffee just the way you like it, the girl that sat next to you in biology class that may have gone on to advance new cures in medicine.
Any of these women could be a woman in your life, right now, living with a secret that could kill her.
“Violent crimes against sex workers go under-reported, under-addressed and under-punished. There are people who don’t care when prostitutes are victims of hate crimes, when they are beaten up, when they are raped, or when they are murdered.”
- Annie Sprinkle
It’s important that even those who do not agree with the ethics of sex work, fully recognize that these women do not deserve to victimized.
It’s been eight years since the day I learned Marisa Zaras was murdered.
Today, fortunately, my inbox is filled mostly with stories of happiness and success.
But the violent reports do still come in.
Every year I am told new stories from victims who have slipped through the cracks when they desperately needed help.
And for every one victim who does speak up, there are ten others who do not because they feel even less empowered.
How can we change this?
Frankly, it’s going to take real work and it’s going to take time.
But there are some quick and easy ways for you to get started right now and I want to share these with you.
This Friday, December 17th, is the seven year anniversary of the International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers, which was started with the help of the Sex Workers Outreach Project (SWOP) and the legendary Annie Sprinkle.
This Friday is an opportunity for you to be involved in stating new conversations on how we can finally put an end to the stigma surrounding our industry.
This Friday is a chance for us to stand together, unified, to support healthy healing from the hurtful hate crimes committed against sex workers in the past.
This Friday is an opportunity to raise awareness that unethical discrimination against sex workers is one of the root causes behind why these unnecessary hate crimes continue to occur undeterred.
Here are 7 ways that you can get involved and show your support for this very important cause:
- One of the easiest way to get involved is to spread the word through your online communities.
For starters, simply clicking this Facebook Like button here will let your Facebook friends know that you appreciate this very post that you are reading: [like_button]
Additionally you can copy and paste the following message, and post it your Facebook, Twitter and blog right now:
Anything to start conversations advocating for a new attitude towards sex workers.
- Consider adding any of these red umbrella widgets to your Facebook, Twitter or blog.
It’s been inspiring for me to see many of my friends posting red umbrellas on Facebook and Twitter this week.
The symbol of the red umbrella was first used for an anti-violence march in Venice, Italy back in 2002. The anti-trafficking legislative efforts put forth by these Italian advocates helped save over 10,000 victims in their country between March 2000 and April 2005, alone. Those numbers are projected to be far greater today.
I’ve created a red umbrella image that you can use to post on your website, Facebook, or Twitter
Choose between a white or black background from here:
- Please consider attending and/or getting involved with one of the pre-organized events this coming Friday.
Here are the current locations: http://swopusa.org/dec17/locations.htm
If you are too far away from any of the pre-organized events you can considering hosting your own. Please contact SWOP directly for more information on how to host in a public setting. Be sure to have them add your location to their list.
- Consider hosting a virtual gathering through your web cam, on a site like UStream.
Virtual is a wonderful way to host, especially if you have concerns about safety, identity discretion, or simply want to share in this conversation with those who are far away.
- If you would rather do something more intimate than hosting a public event, or hosting a virtual gathering, by no means do you have to make your location known to the general public.
You could invite your allies over to your home through personal email, text, or a phone call, and keep your gathering more private.
Supporting this movement can even be as simple as calling one single friend of yours on Friday, and having a brief conversation about this topic.
The point is to start new conversations and create a safe space where authentic support can be felt.
- Another powerful way to contribute is through monetary donation.
I recommend funneling your charity dollars to the amazing folks over at the Sex Worker Outreach Project. http://www.swopusa.org/contribute
As always, spend your dollars with organizations and companies that support the safety and empowerment of adult entertainers. Do your research and make your dollars count.
- Last, even if you just take a single moment on Friday to quietly reflect on this issue to yourself, that is a contribution.
Mindful thought is a powerful force!
I hope you have gotten some value from this post. If you found this post informative you are welcome to forward it to your friends. And if you would like to use this article on your own site, please do so. I just ask that you publish no more than the first 200 words of this post, with a link leading back to my original blog post here.
As always, please comment below and let me know your thoughts. I love reading your comments, and I’d really like to hear how you plan to participate this Friday.
In solidarity,
Erin
Why would you use Twitter as an adult entertainer?
. Congratulations on creating such a treasure, and presenting a very complex subject in such an easy to follow & non-threatening way.”
So I’ll be eagerly anticipating the rest of your advice. Thank you soooo much! You definitely have my respect & not many can say that 
Light-bringers and Candle-bearers